Week 26 – Christmas In July

Guys – guess what.

Christmas is only 25 weeks away.

We’ve already lost a week since I doodled my first list (above).

I don’t want to sound like Chicken Little here, (well, I kinda do), but listen – I have a plan.

The way Christmas “gifting” usually goes in my little world, is this:

I know Christmas is coming. Someone mentions that Christmas is only 86 days away and I have a mini panic attack, even though 86 days is a ridiculously long time. Well, not really when you have science projects and sports and homework for 3 kids, and PTA meetings, and, well. . . life going on.

So I usually ignore the 86 day warning, feigning my panic as disgrace at the commercialism retail stores have wrought on Christmas.

And Thanksgiving comes and goes.

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Stuffed French Toast

You know how “they” advise that, if you want to be fashionable,  you should mix and match when selecting your outfit for the day? As in: mix and match expensive, fancy stuff with less expensive, less impressive stuff – so your outfit inspires interest and intrigue? So, maybe you’d wear a $10 T-shirt with a $50 scarf, mix and match the rest of the outfit, and top it off with $200 shoes and a $5 cocktail ring?

(I have yet to dress myself in every-day attire that totals $265. . . .)

This french toast is sort of like that outfit:

  • Artisan bread = $75 skinny jeans
  • Goat cheese = $180 shimmery blouse
  • Center cut bacon = $60 bauble necklace
  • Granny Smith apples = $ 10 earings
  • Fresh scallions = $20 bangles
  • Fresh ground pepper = $10 go-to body spray
  • Aunt Jemima Maple Flavored syrup? = $20 adorable Payless shoes that make the outfit.

OK, so shoot me. I love Aunt Jemima syrup.

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Sneaky Concord Grapes

Originally, I was going to make this the world’s shortest post. It was going to say this:

I have three words for you:

Frozen.     Concord.      Grapes.

And then I thought, “They’re pretty awesome.They deserve more than that.”

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Pipo’s Pork| “Lechon”

Can you die from squirting pork juice in your eye? Is pork juice what it’s called?

What about going blind? Could I go blind? I just splattered my right eye with packaged pig water as I was dumping it into the slow cooker. . . .

Just wondering. I’ll let you know.

Currently – my eye sight is fine. And no signs yet of illness.

As I’m glancing down at my abdomen now, to judge the normalness of it, I am also looking at my really bright orange shirt that’s almost red.

And I’m also wondering – does anyone else also avoid wearing red shirts when they shop at Target?

Because usually I do.

I don’t want to be mistaken for an employee.

Although I’m pretty sure no one would mistake me as such, when I have three or four kids trailing along behind me and my cart is packed to the hilt with things we absolutely-need-but-I-happened-to-forget until I was wandering through the store.

So I don’t think anyone would mistake me at that point.

However, on my second round through the store when I am putting everything back on the shelf, they might – at that moment – consider that I might be a stock person.

Just sayin’.

So anyway, usually I avoid wearing red at Target, and usually I try not to spritz my looking balls with pork juice.

Good advice, and good pork.

Here’s the scoop.

I have a Cuban Mima, who happens to be married to a Cuban Pipo, and he makes this rockin’ pork.

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Double Chocolate Cheesecake

If you have ever been on the hunt for the best chocolate cheesecake recipe ever,

Stop. Right. Now.

This is it.

Some days call for cookies, some call for straight up candy, and some really intense days call for really intense dessert.

With 32 ounces of full strength cream cheese, 8 ounces of semi-sweet chocolate, and 18 Oreo cookies in the crust, this cake doesn’t mess around.

There’s no beating around the bush here.

This isn’t dessert, it’s DESSERT.

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Week 24 – Lessons from Dad

To all the great dads out there – try to kick back and relax a little today. Do what makes you happy. Grill something. Drill something. Hit some golf balls. Catch some fish. Take a nap. Eat some bacon. Hug your kids. Whatever it is, enjoy your day!

Whether he knew he was teaching them or not, my own Dad has instilled in me plenty of lessons about living, and today, I’ll leave just a few of them with you:

1. Life is not fair. – No explanation necessary. He was the first to speak it to me, and it’s nothing but true.

2. Never assume. It just makes and ass out of you and me. – Can you see it? It’s right there in the word: Ass-u-me. And it’s true. How many mistakes and humiliating moments are borne of assumption??

3. A dinner of popcorn and grapes is sometimes perfectly acceptable.

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Fresh Corn Salad

Enter: summer staple.

Make it for the beach. Make it for road trips. Make it for bar-b-ques.

Make it for parties, or quiet nights in, or to pack in lunches, or a midweek dinner side dish.

Make it for a church potluck. Make it for a 4th of July party. Make it and split it with your neighbors.

Eat it with dinner, or lunch, or even breakfast.

Just make it, and enjoy it. . . .

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Summer Berry Crumble for Two

My dear Baby Girl,

Please come and have a tea party with me.

I know right now your little rose shaped lips don’t like warm, squishy fruit, but that’s OK.

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Week 23 – Eight Phrases Worth Living

Eat your frog first. – That ugly thing you have to do today? Just do it. Bite the bullet. Yes, I’m defining one catch-phrase with other catch phrases. Good ol’ M-Tizzee hit the nail on the head with this one:

“Eat a live frog every morning, and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.” – Mark Twain

Fill your cup. – Literally and figuratively. Have some coffee. Or a cocktail. But just take time to make sure your tank is full. Rest, relax. Exercise. Read. Create. Fill you up so you can be there for those who need you.

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